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"Missing"

Please, please forgive me,
But I won't be home again.
Maybe someday you'll look up,
And, barely conscious, you'll say to no one:
"Isn't something missing?"

You won't cry for my absence, I know -
You forgot me long ago.
Am I that unimportant...?
Am I so insignificant...?
Isn't something missing?
Isn't someone missing me?

[Chorus:]
Even though I'm the sacrifice,
You won't try for me, not now.
Though I'd die to know you love me,
I'm all alone.
Isn't someone missing me?

Please, please forgive me,
But I won't be home again.
I know what you do to yourself,
I breathe deep and cry out,
"Isn't something missing?
Isn't someone missing me?"

[Chorus]

And if I bleed, I'll bleed,
Knowing you don't care.
And if I sleep just to dream of you
I'll wake without you there,
Isn't something missing?
Isn't something...

[Chorus]

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“Holiday”

Hear the sound of the falling rain
Coming down like an Armageddon flame (Hey!)
The shame
The ones who died without a name

Hear the dogs howling out of key
To a hymn called "Faith and Misery" (Hey!)
And bleed, the company lost the war today

I beg to dream and differ from the hollow lies
This is the dawning of the rest of our lives
On holiday

Hear the drum pounding out of time
Another protestor has crossed the line (Hey!)
To find, the money's on the other side

Can I get another Amen? (Amen!)
There's a flag wrapped around a score of men (Hey!)
A gag, A plastic bag on a monument

I beg to dream and differ from the hollow lies
This is the dawning of the rest of our lives
On holiday

"The representative from California has the floor"

Zieg Heil to the president gasman
Bombs away is your punishment
Pulverize the Eiffel towers
Who criticize your government
Bang bang goes the broken glass and
Kill all the fags that don't agree
Trials by fire, setting fire
Is not a way that's meant for me
Just cause, just cause, because we're outlaws yeah!

I beg to dream and differ from the hollow lies
This is the dawning of the rest of our lives
I beg to dream and differ from the hollow lies
This is the dawning of the rest of our lives

This is our lives on holiday

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"18 Wheeler"

Can't keep me down
Can't keep me down, down
Can't keep me down
I said you can't keep me down
You know you can't keep me down
I said you can't keep me down

Hey, hey, man! What's your problem?
I see you tryin' to hurt me bad
Don't know what you're up against
Maybe you should reconsider
Come up with another plan
Cuz you know I'm not that kinda girl
That'll lay there and let you come first

You can push me out the window
I'll just get back up
You can run over me with your 18 wheeler truck
And I won't give a fuck
You can hang me like a slave
I'll go underground
You can run over me with your 18 wheeler but
You can't keep me down, down, down, down

Can't keep me down, down
Can't keep me down, down, down
Can't keep me down, down

Hey, hey, girl! Are you ready for today?
You got your shield and sword?
Cuz its time to play the games
You are beautiful
Even though your not for sure
Don't let him pull you by the scar
You're gonna get your feelings hurt

You can push me out the window
I'll just get back up
You can run over me with your 18 wheeler truck
And I won't give a fuck
You can hang me like a slave
I'll go underground
You can run over me with your 18 wheeler but
You can't keep me down, down, down, down

You can push me out the window
I'll just get back up
You can run over me with your 18 wheeler truck
And I won't give a fuck
You can hang me like a slave
I'll go underground
You can run over me with your 18 wheeler but
You can't keep me down, down, down, down

Everywhere that I go
There's someone waitin' to chain me
Everything that I say
There's someone tryin' to short-change me
I am only this way
Because of what you have made me
And I'm not gonna break!

You can push me out the window
I'll just get back up
You can run over me with your 18 wheeler truck
And I won't give a fuck
You can hang me like a slave
I'll go underground
You can run over me with your 18 wheeler but
You can't keep me down, down, down, down

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“The Fat-kins Diet”

from www.illwillpress.com

OK, I'm fuckin' sick of this Fat-kins diet.
You fuckin' carb-counting assholes really need to stop.
All I hear out of everyone’s mouth is,
“Oh I can't eat that; it has carbs."
Gnaaaaa!!!
Well you know what, you need carbs.
If you don't have carbs your brain rots, and your liver gets damaged.
Nice.
You’re thin, and have some weird-ass mental disease and a bad liver!
Yep, the vanity is worth it!

I'm also sick of this fuckin' exchange program.
Where you minus the fiber grams
from the fat grams and the carb grams to determine,
what the carb ratio is in your food.
Fuck that.
When I pick up a food, I'm not gonna start doing addition and subtraction,
to see if it's a fuckin' meal I can eat.
How about just minusing some fuckin' food from your everyday eating binges,
you fat bastards.
Stop looking to some dead man for a quick fix diet and just eat like a sensible human being.

You never see any fat squirrels do ya?
Why?
Because we exercise by jumping from tree to tree and we only eat nuts.
And the occasional bagel.

Stop being so concerned about your image and just be yourself.
If you’re a fat bastard, fine. Be a fat bastard.
If you're an anorexic jackass with a thyroid problem, fine! Be a twig!

Stop doing all these unnecessary diets.
Cause you know, once you get down to your goal weight, you're gonna be like,
"Sure, I can have an extra piece of cake, look at all the weight I lost!”
Then before you know it, RRRWEEET!
Back on a diet cause your ass is fallin' out of your jeans.

You fat bastards.

Besides I’m not going to buy into a fuckin’ diet that says,
“You know what? You can have three burgers and a pound of bacon
but you can’t have an apple.
Because an apple has carbs.”
Eeeeeee!!!

Just be yourself. Eat that Twinkie,
enjoy that cake,
buy that extra pound of Gourmet cream cheese you always wanted.
And if people look at you funny because you're too fat or too skinny,
tell em to fuck off and die.

You do not need to adhere to the idealistic vision of beauty
marketed by fashion magazines and
negatively re-enforced a society dumb enough
to believe that beauty only appears on the cover of a magazine.

Fuck them all!!!

Now where’s my waffle sundae?

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"Helena"

Long ago
Just like the hearse you die to get in again
We are so far from you

Burning on just like a match you strike to incinerate
The lives of everyone you know
And what's the worst you take (worst you take)
from every heart you break (heart you break)
And like the blade you stain (blade you stain)
Well I've been holding on tonight

[Chorus]
What's the worst that I can say?
Things are better if I stay
So long and goodnight
So long not goodnight

Came a time
When every star fall brought you to tears again
We are the very hurt you sold
And what's the worst you take (worst you take)
from every heart you break (heart you break)
And like the blade you stain (blade you stain)
Well I've been holding on tonight

[Chorus]
What's the worst that I can say?
Things are better if I stay
So long and goodnight
So long not goodnight
And if you carry on this way
Things are better if I stay
So long and goodnight
So long not goodnight

Can you hear me?
Are you near me?
Can we pretend to leave and then
We'll meet again
When both our cars collide?

[Chorus]
What's the worst that I can say?
Things are better if I stay
So long and goodnight
So long not goodnight
And if you carry on this way
Things are better if I stay
So long and goodnight
So long not goodnight

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"Fly From The Inside"

Here's the weight of the world on my shoulders
Here's the weight of the world on my shoulders
On my shoulders
All alone I pierce the chain
And on and on the sting remains
And dieing eyes consume me now
The voice inside screams out loud

[Chorus:]
I am focused on what I am after
The key to the next open chapter
Cause I found a way to steal the sun from the sky
Long live that day that I decided to fly from the inside

Every day a new deception
Pick your scene and take direction
And on and on I search to connect
But I don't wear a mask and I have no regrets

I am focused on what I am after
The key to the next open chapter

[Chorus]

I can't escape the pain
I can't control the rage
Sometimes I think that I'm gonna go insane
I'm not against what's right
I'm not for what's wrong
I'm just making my way and I'm gone

Here's the weight of the world on my shoulders

[Chorus x2]

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"45"

Send away for a priceless gift
One not subtle, one not on the list
Send away for a perfect world
One not simply, so absurd
In these times of doing what you're told
You keep these feelings, no one knows
What ever happened to the young man's heart
Swallowed by pain, as he slowly fell apart

And I'm staring down the barrel of a 45,
Swimming through the ashes of another life
No real reason to accept the way things have changed
Staring down the barrel of a 45

Send a message to the unborn child
Keep your eyes open for a while
In a box high up on the shelf, left for you, no one else
There's a piece of a puzzle known as life
Wrapped in guilt, sealed up tight

What ever happened to the young man's heart
Swallowed by pain, as he slowly fell apart

[CHORUS]

Everyone's pointing their fingers
Always condemning me
And nobody knows what I believe
I believe

[CHORUS]

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"Don't Lie"

[WILL]
Hey, baby my nose is getting big
I noticed it be growing when I been telling them fibs
Now you say your trust's getting weaker
Probably coz my lies just started getting deeper
And the reason for my confession is that I learn my lesson
And I really think you have to know the truth
Because I lied and I cheated and I lied a little more
But after I did it I don't know what I did it for
I admit that I have been a little immature
Fucking with your heart like I was the predator
In my book of lies I was the editor
And the author
I forged my signature
And now I apologise for what I did to you
Cos what you did to me I did to you

[FERGIE]
Nononono baby, nononono don't lie
Nononono, yeah you kno know know know you gotta try
What you gonna do when it all comes out
When I see you & what you're all about

Nonono baby, nononono don't lie
Yeah you kno you kno you kno you kno you know you gotta try

[APL]
She said I'm leaving
Cos she can't take the pain
It's hard to continue this love it ain't the same
Can't forget the things that I've done inside her brain
Too many lies committed too many games
She feeling like a fool getting on the last train
Trying to maintain but the feeling won't change
I'm sorry for the things that I've done and what I became
Caught up in living my life in the fast lane
Blinded by lights, cameras, you know the fame
I don't know the reason why I did these things

[APL and FERGIE]
And I lie and I lie and I lie and I lie
And now our emotions are drained
Cos I lie and I lie and a little lie lie
And now your emotions are drained

[FERGIE]
Nononono baby, nononono don't lie (no, don't you lie)
Nononono, yeah you know know know know you gotta try (got to try, got to try)
What you gonna do when it all comes out (what you gonna do baby)
When I see you & what you're all about
Nonono babe, nononono don't lie
Because you kno you kno you kno you kno you know gotta try

Ooh ooh ooh, ooh ooh ooh ooh
Ba da ba da ba da ba da badabada

[TABOO]
Yo, I'm lying to my girl
Even though I love her
And she all in my world
I give her all my attention and diamonds & pearls
She's the one who makes me feel on top of the world
Still I lie to my girl, I do it

[APL and FERGIE]
And I lie and I lie and I lie till there's no turning back
I don't know why, (and I lie and I lie till I don't know who I am)

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"Foamy Fan Mail VII"

from www.illwillpress.com

More mail from the masses! How they adore me so.

Dear Foamy, What the hell happened to Germaine's head? She looks completely different!

Eh, I knew this would come up.

Well, apparently the creator of this cartoon was sick and tired of having Germaine look like a rejected Simpsons' character. So he went all silly-like and changed shit around. Frankly, she's a secondary character and it doesn't matter what she looks like. So don't get your asshole all in a knot over this. At leats she doesn't look like a bad Tim Burton doodle anymore

Damn, she was ugly! And crudely drawn!

Anyways, I'm sure her face, as well as other secondary characters are gonna change somewhere down the line. The creator is picky and likes to fuck with shit, just to be annoying. So bear with this idiocy.
PS: Germaine still has a fat ass. So fear not; her jiggly butt is still in tact.

Next letter!

Dear Foamy, Do you really eat bagels?

Come on! You know I do!

Dear Foamy, In October when you had the "Foamy Look-a-Like Contest", how come the pictures I submitted didn't win?

*Foamy groans*

Dear Annie Leibowitz, Well there's a simple explaination for this; YOU SENT PICTURES OF A DAMN CAT!!!! Am I a cat? No! I am not a cat. I don't look like a cat, I don't think like a cat, and I don't know any cats that have a T-shit with the logo "Squirrely Wrath" on it! S q u i r r e l y. O-kay.

*Foamy sniffs* I smell ink! From the next letter! Let's see. Ah, jeez. This is an old one.

*in mocking voice* Dear Foamy, I didn't get my Foamy DVD in time for Christmas and now I hate you because you didn't ship on time.

*Foamy groans*

Dear Fart Collector, It is not my fault that your poor planning led you to order the Foamy DVD one day before Christmas. Unless, I had a time machine, there wasn't a chance in Hell it was gonna get to you in time. So don't blame me for your lack of orthaw and perpetual procrastination. Idiot. And, frankly *in mocking voice* anyone who thinks Christmas is ruined because they didn't get a gift, doesn't know the true meaning of Christmas, and is a shallow greedy asshole.
PS: Go kill yourself.
Signed, Your Lord & Master Foamy

Merry Christmas, fucker!

Next!

Dear Foamy, Have you spoken to God lately?

What? What the-? Why does Jesus keep e-mailing me?! Okay, that's it! I'm done! Damn religious spam! It ruins everything!

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"Foamy's Rant II"

from www.illwillpress.com

All right, more people that are really fucking pissing me off. Now, for all you people who actually pay attention to the news, there's a bunch of fat bastards who wanted to sue the... McDoogles, you know... the people with the burgers and the stuff like that? Why? Because they were too fat. Far be it from them to admit to themselves, "hey, you know what? I should have stopped after eating 15 burgers." Nope! The fact that they have a fat ass is not their fault, it's McDoogles fault - or whatever fast food restaurant they decided to sue. My problem is, somebody actually considered taking on this case! These fucking lawyers who are like "yeah, you know what? We can sue this restaurant because you're a fat fuck." What are you saying when you're... when you're in front of the judge? "Yes, your honor, I'm a fat bastard and it's all because of this fast food chain." Give me a fucking break. Someone should just stab you in the eyes with a fucking really hot french fry, you fat bastard. Hope you choke on your own fat. Fatty!

Okay, now getting off the topic of fat asses, let's talk about these fucking cell phone mother-fuckers. Dude, put the phone away. You're a fucking self-important little fucking bastard. Nobody is really calling you. It's like, you're walking around, pressing a little button that makes that fake ringing sound. Give me a fucking break! You just want people to think that people are calling you. Nobody is calling you, you're a loser, and you're paying like $70 a month for no reason. Why, what do you need a cell phone for, so... so your mother can call you to pick up groceries on the way home from work? Give me a fucking break, okay? Grow up. If I have to hear another fucking cell phone go off when I'm eating at a diner, or I'm at a movie, I'm gonna fucking rip somebody's head off.

And speaking of diners, is it just me, or are the rest of you really fucking sick of these children with the high-pitched frequency of whining and yelling that just fucking drills itself right into your brain? I, for one, really want the mothers or fathers to just start beating the shit out of these kids until they're fucking silent or go into a coma. I'm so sick trying to eat a burger or something and having this whining kid complaining that he doesn't have ice cream. You know what, he wants ice cream? You lock him in the freezer, keep him there for about six hours, I'm sure he'll have his fill of ice cream. So... he's a little frostbitten and loses a toe or two. Fuck him, fuck the parents, get these whiny fucking bastards out of my diner. Let me eat in peace, you fat bastards.

Now let's talk English language. What I'm speaking here right now is English. I'm tired of fucking picking up a cup of coffee, and having about fifteen different languages telling me that it's hot. Ooh... Caution Muy Caliente, Vorsch Heist! Give me a fucking break! Can't you just put a picture? Look... look. Here's what I did. I came up with a little picture, you see, you put this picture on the side of a cup, a little guy holding a cup of coffee, and he's on fire. That gets the message across. I'm tired of different languages. If you're in France, speak French. When you're in America, you speak English, okay? When my grand-squirrel came to this country, you know what? He had to learn English. You know what you should do? Learn fucking English! I'm so sick of having to whip out an Idiot-to-English dictionary to figure out what the fuck you're trying to say. Just speak plain English, okay? Let me ‘splain to you something, okay? [in a Span-glish accent Spanish/English] Nobody likes to hear the English language get slaughtered? So fucking stop it, okay? Don't make me ask you for your green card. Now that I have alienated all the non-English-speaking people, see now, here's my thing: if they don't speak English and they don't understand the language, would they get offended that I'm telling them that they have to learn English? Huh? Ahh! Ahh! Ahh! Ohhh! Twisting the brain... ooh!

So in closing, learn how to speak English, you fat bastards, and get off the fucking cell phone. Por Favor. Fucking jackasses.

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"Broken Bones"

You forget I got this far without you
I'm not the person that you think I am
The life I want to lead needs no approval
From somone who will never understand

Youre forgetting my broken bones
Forgetting im not alone
Hard to stand alone
When this feels like home
In this crowd

Just because you lived a little longer
Doesnt mean your will is any stronger
You forget that all these scars remember
Everytime you say I need to change

Youre forgetting my broken bones
Forgetting im not alone
Hard to stand alone
When this feels like home
In this crowd

The decisions that we make
To stand alone

Youre forgetting my broken bones
Forgetting im not alone
Hard to stand alone
When this feels like home
In this crowd

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"Firefly"

You my friend
You're a lot like them
But I cut your line
And you know I did
Now I'm lost in you
Like I always do
And I'd die to win
'Cause I'm born to lose

[Chorus:]
Firefly
Could you shine your light
Now I know your ways
'cause they're just like mine
Now I'm justified
As I fall in line
And it's hard to try
When you're open wide

Take my hand
We'll be off and then
We'll come back again
To a different land
Now I like this way
You can go away
If you guess the name
You cannot replace

[Chorus]

Bring me your enemies
Lay them before me
And walk away

[Chorus]

Fuck you firefly
Have you lost your light
Now I hate your ways
'cause they're just like mine
So you lost my friend
Such a sorry end
And I don't know why
So I choke and smile

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"Wings Of A Butterfly"

Heaven ablaze in our eyes
We're standing still in time
The blood on our hands is the wine
We offer as sacrifice

[Chorus]
Come on, and show them your love
Rip out the wings of a butterfly
For your soul, my love
Rip out the wings of a butterfly
For your soul

This endless mercy mile
We're crawling side by side
With hell freezing over in our eyes
Gods kneel before our crime

[Chorus]
Come on lets show, them your love
Rip out the wings of a butterfly
For your soul, my love
Rip out the wings of a butterfly
For your soul
(Rip out the wings of a butterfly)
Don’t let go
(Rip out the wings of a butterfly)
For your soul

[Chorus]
Come on, and show them your love
Rip out the wings of a butterfly
For your soul, my love
Rip out the wings of a butterfly
For your soul
(Rip out the wings of a butterfly)
Don’t let go
(Rip out the wings of a butterfly) [x2]

For your soul

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"Fake"

This place has begun to cover me
I recall the light, but the dark smothers me
I prefer the feelings I know right now
I don't worry about feeling very proud

You don't know how it feels
To be misunderstood
To reach for the sky
I thought you never would
You don't know how it feels
To be misunderstood
To reach for the sky
I thought you never would

But I'm bleeding, and my hands are bruised
From the grip that I once had on you
And I'm open for a new way
Because there's not much more that I can fake

It's almost seeing your soul for the first time
And watching the mirror show you life in rewind
Capture the ridicule of everyone
I'm tired of trying, and they wonder why I'm gone

You don't know how it feels
To be misunderstood
To reach for the sky
I thought you never would
You don't know how it feels
To be misunderstood
To reach for the sky
I thought you never would

But I'm bleeding, and my hands are bruised
From the grip that I once had on you
And I'm open for a new way
Because there's not much more that I can fake

I can't fake it

You don't know how it feels
To be misunderstood
To reach for the sky
I thought you never would
You don't know how it feels
To be misunderstood
To reach for the sky
I thought you never would

But I'm bleeding, and my hands are bruised
From the grip that I once had on you
And I'm open for a new way
Because there's not much more that I can fake
But I'm bleeding, and my hands are bruised
From the grip that I once had on you
And I'm open for a new way
Because there's not much more that I can fake

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"Save Me"

I got a candle
And I’ve got a spoon
I live in a hallway with no doors
And no rooms

Under a windowsill
They all were found
A touch of concrete within the doorway
Without a sound

Someone save me if you will
And take away all these pills
And please just save me if you can
From the blasphemy in my wasteland

How did I get here
And what went wrong
Couldn’t handle forgiveness
Now I’m far beyond gone

I can hardly remember
The look of my own eyes
How can I love this a life so dishonest
It made me compromise

Someone save me if you will
And take away all these pills
And please just save me if you can
From the blasphemy in my wasteland

Jump in the water
Jump in with me
Jump on the alter
Lay down with me

The hardest question to answer
Is why

Why

Someone save me if you will
And take away all these pills
And please just save me if you can
From the blasphemy in my wasteland

Someone save me
Someone save me
Somebody save me
Somebody save me
Please don’t erase me

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"I Write Sins Not Tragedies"

Oh, well imagine, as I'm pacing the pews in a church corridor,
and I can't help but to hear, no I can't help but to hear an exchanging of words:
"What a beautiful wedding! What a beautiful wedding!" says a bridesmaid to a waiter.
"And yes, but what a shame, what a shame, the poor groom's bride is a whore."

I'd chime in with a "Haven't you people ever heard of closing a goddamn door?!"
No, it's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality.
I'd chime in, "Haven't you people ever heard of closing a goddamn door?!"
No, it's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of...

Well in fact, well I'll look at it this way, I mean technically our marriage is saved
Well this calls for a toast, so pour the champagne
Oh! Well in fact, well I'll look at it this way, I mean technically our marriage is saved
Well this calls for a toast, so pour the champagne, pour the champagne

I'd chime in with a "Haven't you people ever heard of closing a goddamn door?!"
No, it's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality.
I'd chime in, "Haven't you people ever heard of closing a goddamn door?!"
No, it's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality.

Again...

I'd chime in, "Haven't you people ever heard of closing a goddamn door?!"
No, it's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality.
I'd chime in, "Haven't you people ever heard of closing a goddamn door?!"
No, it's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality.

Again...

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

"Miss Murder"

Hey Miss Murder can I?
Hey Miss Murder can I?
Make beauty stay if I,
Take my life?

Whoa-oh-ohh

With just a look they shook
And heavens bowed before him.
Simply a look can break your heart.
The stars that pierce the sky;
He left them all behind.
We’re left to wonder why
He left us all behind.

Hey Miss Murder can I?
Hey Miss Murder can I?
Make beauty stay if I,
Take my life?
Whoa-oh-ohh
(ohh)

Dreams of his crash won’t pass
Or how they all adored him.
Beauty will last when spiraled down.
The stars that mystify
He left them all behind.
And how his children cry
He left us all behind.

Hey Miss Murder can I?
Hey Miss Murder can I?
Make beauty stay if I,
Take my life?
Whoa-oh-ohh

What's the hook, the twist
Within this verbose mystery?
I would gladly bet my life upon it.
That the ghost you love, your ray of light
Will fizzle out without hope.
We're the empty set just floating through, wrapped in skin,
Ever searching for what we were promised.
Reaching for the golden ring we never let go,
Who would ever let us put our filthy hands upon it.

Hey Miss Murder can I?
Hey Miss Murder can I?
Make beauty stay if I,
Take my life?
Whoa-oh-ohh

Hey Miss Murder can I?
Hey Miss Murder can I?
Make beauty stay if I,
Take my life?
Whoa-oh-ohh

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stolen from jon teehee:

Is Your Child a Goth? Presented by St. Mary's Church

Listed below are some warning signs to indicate if your child may have gone astray from the Lord. Gothic (or goth) is a very obscure and often dangerous culture that young teenagers are prone to participating in. The gothic culture leads young, susceptible minds into an imagined world of evil, darkness, and violence. Please seek immediate attention through counselling, prayer, and parental guidance to rid your child of Satan's temptations if five or more of the following are applicable to your child.

-Frequently wears black clothing.

-Wears band and/or rock t-shirts.

-Wears excessive black eye makeup, lipstick or nail polish.

-Wears any odd silver jewelry or symbols.

-Shows an interest in piercings or tattoos.

-Listens to gothic or any other anti-social genres of music. (Marilyn Manson claims to be the anti-Christ, and publicly speaks against the Lord. Please discard any such albums IMMEDIATELY.)

-Associates with other people that dress, act or speak eccentrically.

-Shows a declining interest in wholesome activities, such as: the Bible, prayer, church, and sports.

-Shows an increasing interest in death, vampires, magic, the occult, witchcraft or anything else that involves Satan.

-Takes drugs.

-Drinks alcohol.

-Is suicidal and/or depressed.

-Cuts, burns or partakes in any other method of self-mutilation. (This is a Satanic ritual that uses pain to detract from the light of God and His love. Please seek immediate attention for this at your local mental health center.)

-Complains of boredom.

-Sleeps too excessively or too little.

-Is excessively awake during the night.

-Demands an unusual amount of privacy.

-Spends large amounts of time alone.

-Requests time alone and quietness.

-Insists on spending time with friends while unaccompanied by an adult.

-Disregards authority figures; teachers, priests, nuns and elders are but a few examples of this.

-Misbehaves at school.

-Misbehaves at home.

-Eats excessively or too little

-Eats goth-related foods. Count Dracula cereal is an example of this.

-Drinks blood or expresses an interest in drinking blood. (Vampires believe this is how to attain Satan. This act is very dangerous and should be stopped immediately.)

-Watches cable television or any other corrupted media sources.

-Plays videos games that contains violence or role-playing nature.

-Uses the internet excessively and frequently makes time for the computer.

-Makes Satanic symbols and/or violently shakes head to music.

-Dances to music in a provocative or sexual manner.

-Expresses an interest in sex.

-Masturbates.

-Is homosexual and/or bisexual.

-Pursues dangerous cult religions. Such include: Satanism, Scientology, Philosophy, Paganism, Wicca, Hinduism and Buddhism.

-Wears pins, stickers or anything else that contains these various phrases: "I'm so gothic, I'm dead", "woe is me", "I'm a goth".

-Claims to be a goth.

If five or more of these apply to your child, please intervene immediately. The gothic culture is dangerous and Satan thrives within it. If any of these problems persist, enlist your child into your local mental health center.

~St. Mary's Catholic Church

heh this list is funny

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Definitions:
American Idiot: someone who thinks Bush is a great leader and has done wonders to our contry
Jon Stewart: opposite of American Idiot

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I'm bC. I used to be sistasis9689 and __b0ttle___cap_ but I'm not anymore.





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